or MAYBE i’m not attracted to Marina because she’s, like, a squid? like maybe the only reason you and your fellow splatton fanbase are attracted to fictional characters is because you’re alone in real life? like living in your parents basement because you know too damn well that you’re just too much of an idiot for community college, let alone undergrad, so you work part time at the Taco Bell across the street from you and pay your parents some rent so you don’t feel as bad about being 28 and living with your fucking parents with no sort of future and then you go online and see all these happy successful people with wives and kids and houses and you think, “Hm, I wonder what it would be like to fucking HAVE A LIFE! Not being fucking STUCK in this limbo revolving around japanese cartoons! I don’t remember the last time I was fucking happy about jack fucking shit!” The only sort of pleasure I even get anymore is from jerking off, and at this point i’m doing it like 10 times a day so the only real pleasure i’m feeling is knowing i’m giving my fat fucking hams a break from jerking my sorry dick for a half hour until i do it again. I waste away my free time fucking playing shitty Osu and watching anime and other forms of petty escapism until i get bored and remember, oh yeah, you’re a useless sack of shit, you’re going to die in 10-15 years because of a stroke, you might as well just off yourself today because you’ll never be anything other than a cog in the greasy diabetic Taco Bell machine.