Octopuses do not have any bones with the exception of theiw beaks. so if you awe wesponsibwe and depwaved enough to be witewawwy the wife suppowt of youw 8 wimbed fwiend, you can debeak it wike how you’d decwaw a cat and then push youw membew into it’s feed chute.
You can then wet it subsist on youw baby battew.
The Octopus is smawt. Vewy smawt. It wiww weawn that without it’s beak, it cannot feed on anything ewse but youw human seed that has to be miwked fwom you.
Evewy mowning, you wiww feew youw cwothes swide off and a damp weight on youw wowew hawf.
The sensation cweeps up youw body untiw most of the jiggwy mass has envewoped the entiwe wength. It wiww stawt pumping as fast as it can fow it is hungwy.
The animaw gywates its empty stomach and the fowds of its bwain wubbing on youw gwans, begging fow nutwition.
You cwimax and give the mawine cweatuwe it’s bweakfast. The pumping swows down but doesn’t stop to miwk out the wast few dwops of its meaw.
Wooking into its yewwow animaw eyes, it wooks back with a thousand-yawd stawe. This wiww be woutine fow aww of its meaws fow the west of it’s 3-5 yeaws on this god fowsaken pwanet.