I have made multiple posts explaining exactly why dendrophilia is not only a PERFECTLY safe and legal sexual preference, but a better alternative overall because no one is victimised in the process like in ‘normal’ relationships.

I just can’t understand why bigotry is so prevalent in society when it comes to plant/tree lovers, it’s ridiculous and IT WILL NOT BE TOLERATED ANY LONGER. Just last week I was in the forest frolicking in the heaps of fallen tree babies that I call my friends (with benefits) when a dog walker passed by and called me a ‘retard’. I was taken aback and shocked at the depths of humanities cruelty. I promptly returned home and cried in my leaf paddling pool and pondered the lengths to which I can make the world a safer space for me and my people.

That’s when it donned on me like a leafy epiphany. If I don’t stand up and fight for our civil rights as plant fornicators, then who will?!

I ask that dendrophilles and normies alike join me in my quest for equality! THE REVOLUTION STARTS HERE, EXCELSIOR!