Okay so this may sound like im
messing with you but I promise I’m
not. I was recently diagnosed with a
terminal disease called
cyroaudiovascularmalexia. Basically
if I don’t get enough blood flow to my
ears they will slowly freeze and will
fall off, and it will spread to my inner
ear and brain. There’s no cure for it
except one, I need to constantly
warm my ears and the only material
soft enough is the inner thighs of a
pretty girl, so I need you to sit on my
face for medical reasons.