i’m a man. a human male. i am 5 foot 1 and built of solid muscle which was chiselled and shaped by heaven’s greatest artists. my strength and confidence knows no bounds. i can hurl a 6 kilogram shot put 500 metres and i have even been to space. you have no idea how manly i am. my pubes are thick and strong like jungle vines and my balls dangle beneath me like the pendulum on a clock tower.

the air crushes around me when i stride. the tides bend before me as i stroll. i am mother nature’s greatest creation. i am perfection. i am a man.