This is the face of a guy who you seriously do not want to screw around with.
I’m not in the habit of threatening people.
I don’t issue threats, I actually make things happen.

I also breathe heavy to scare cats. For fun.
When they come to gas me, I’ll be ready.
P.S. I like cats – I can take or leave gas, it’s all the same to me.

Do we have an understanding?

Its not hard to find out where somebody lives.
Turn up there unexpectedly and have a nice ”chat” about their rudeness or anti-social tendencies.
Followed by a quick and highly effective demonstration of ultra-violence if necessary.
The ultra-violence is the bit I like best and I’m very good at it.

Now that I have your attention most of the above was humorous.

Guess which bits were serious.

Did I mention I lie a lot? For fun?

Like for example, this bits a lie, so is the bit above it. Come to think about it, I’m lying about lying.

Anyway, this is my game and dessert eating face. I eat a lot of dessert. I’m very good at it. There are many game-faces like it but this one is mine. If I’m in a game and you’re my opponent, this is the face I’m wearing behind my screen as I reduce your defenses to ruins and hum a merry tune about squishing things. NOTICE the big brainpan and wide forehead? Yeah, that’s all me baby! I have a brain most zombies would kill for. THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX but if you have a cat, get inside one – it freaks them out completely. I’m a high-functioning bi-polar case meaning most of the time I’m completely depressed, suicidal and mildly paranoid at times, which is enormous fun. My doctor does not understand me, my social worker does not understand me but at least the mirror (and the parallel universe me in it) understands me which is nice, although I will admit the touch of gray at my temples makes me look distinguished now I’m fifty years old.

I specialize in kit-bashed scratch-built Eighties style spaceships and hardware. I do not take commissions. I presently live in Winchester, Hampshire and am disabled/permanently on welfare. You can reach me directly at [email protected] – WARNING: I am very protective of the work in my catalogue (gallery) and rabidly WILL PURSUE LEGAL ACTION (prosecution) of any person, party or company which utilizes individual designs, elements, concepts or any other material from this site irrespective of use or purpose. You are welcome to look at the material but you may not under any circumstances use or adapt any of my work for your own ends. The material is protected by INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY RIGHTS and copyright. Failure to accept this will lead to my seeking high value damages against the offending party. I’ve been operating as an independent technical artist specializing in blueprint style illustration for more than thirty years and have associates worldwide who can provide evidence to that end should I need to prove it. The only elements excempt from this are pieces which are based on existing intellectual property held by other persons. Even then, copy my work and attempt to pass it off as your own and we’re talking about … well, I love digging shallow graves in boggy places with a high predator density and very few visitors – and that goes for anyone who has crossed me, assuming that they managed to get the concrete booties off and somehow stopped inhaling a river … yes, yes, I’m still lying.