I sexually Identify as French. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of hon honing under l’arc de triomphe dropping hot sticky crepes on disgusting tourists. People say to me that a person being a French is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beau. I’m having a plastic surgeon install a large nose, goatee and finely aged baguettes on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me Marien and respect my right to surrender from below and surrender needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a francophobe and need to check your anglosphere privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.

P.S. my pronouns are Il/Le/Lui and you better fucking respect them, merde-lords