I’ve been obsessed with Garfield, ever since I saw Jon Arbuckle naked.

I remember when I was really little, I’d walk to the library to read books. I grew up poor, so I didn’t have much in the way of entertainment. So every morning til evening I’d spend my days in the library, poring over endless books.

I happened upon a nice clutch of Garfield comic books in the kids section. You remember the Garfield comic books, right? Paperback, longer than they were tall. A few had covers that sparkled, commemorating 5, or 10 years or holiday editions.

Well, one day, I picked out one published in 1981. Third issue. It had a dark turquoise cover. “GARFIELD: BIGGER THAN LIFE” was the title, with the titular character himself sitting beside it proclaiming, “I’m fat and I’m lazy and I’m proud of it!” I’ll never forget it.

But anyway, this isn’t about Garfield. This is about Jon.

The comic strip started simple enough. Jon was walking past Garfield sitting on the table, heading to the living room where his friend Lyman was established to be in the strip on the previous page. He said something that annoyed Garfield, who had just noticed a stray thread hanging off his sweater.

The portly tabby stuck out his claw which caught on the string. The string got longer and longer as Jon walked away while the fat cartoon cat smiled mischievously. This persisted for a few panels until the last panel, where an embarrassed and annoyed Jon Arbuckle reappears before Garfield, stark naked but for a tiny clump of strings he held in front of his nethers. Garfield said something smartalecky, I can’t remember… The punchline was lost on me because of how obsessed I was over seeing Jon Arbuckle’s uncovered form.

That last panel. God, that last panel, I remember sitting in that library staring at it for half an hour, fascinated. His body was so sublime. It was the body of a god. Jon Arbuckle was a sexy, naked man. I desperately wished that tiny clump of string wasn’t there and I could see my man in all his naked glory. Just the thought of that made me feel things I never felt before.

https://imgur.com/dc8hIN5