the mental image of a succulent turd bravely bearing it’s head out of an anus, basically begging for someone to take a bite. And how could you not? So we are on the same page, we are dealing with a gritty and girthy turd. Ain’t what your mama shits at home. Superior texture, much like oatmeal with molasses mixed in or should I say cookie dough getting squeezed out of a tube. Just like the cookie dough, this has little chunks as well. But opposed to feeling a chocolate chip in your mouth you are feeling a piece of digested corn. Such a piece of immaculate turd yields 5000 yen per bite, certainly a delicacy. Only farmed from the most premium Japanese men who are fed a strict diet of only corn and cookie dough. Oh and lots of prune juice of course. For the first few weeks of this 5000 calories a day diet, these human easy bake ovens are forced to smoke hella opium which causes extreme constipation which is desired. All of this food becomes severely compacted and is forced to marinate. Almost a month later and we have the final product. A turd fit for a king. With a milk enema it shall be released.