So there I was, putting on my rape shoes, and practicing my sexual harassment pickup lines this morning. I just got done cyber bullying my Coworkers. It was time to shave, I yelled at my wife to smile because I demand it, while pinching her but cheek right after she told me she didn’t consent to it. Putting on my shaving cream and thinking about how I can get my son into a fight at the next BBQ, I replaced the worn Gillette brand Mach3 and began to chant “boys will be boys” as I started to shave. Suddenly my 3’1 Taiwanese daughter burst into the room holding her phone. As I began to mansplain to her why she isn’t smart enough to know my shaving time in my time, then she showed me the new Gillette ad. I realised how every view and behaviour I’ve ever held dear was wrong. I’m calling in sick at the toxic masculinity factory today. thanks Gillette