I’m feeling spiteful because my orange stain of a champion got nothing of worth done in 4 years, is regarded as one of the worst presidents ever by any actual metric other than his cult’s opinion, and couldn’t win a second term against a milquetoast opponent despite the twin advantages of almost free reign to cheat the second election and a massive brainwashed cult. Meanwhile, this brown person who dared mock my personal savior got two terms, is still respected by a huge portion of the country and world, and has a crowning achievement that has withstood the full brunt of our mighty army even when we controlled the whole government and made it the main rallying cry of our bid for power.


Also, come over soon because your mother made the video of Youtube take up the whole screen and we can’t make it get small again. We love Trump as much as the next guy, but that video of him showing the press that his very impressive test shows exactly how good his brain works has been playing for months now and we can’t stop thinking person, woman, man, camera, TV.

We love you even though you’re a filthy lib, but would love you more if you weren’t tearing this family apart with your unamerican selfishness.